16-Year-Old Says Parents ‘Drain’ Her Both Financially and Emotionally, Go Through Her Things and Take Her Money

16-Year-Old Says Parents ‘Drain’ Her Both Financially and Emotionally, Go Through Her Things and Take Her Money https://ift.tt/RJM1dqe

The 16-year-old works at Pizza Hut and has been saving up to eventually move out

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NEED TO KNOW

• A teenager shared on Reddit that her parents "constantly" make her buy them things
• Recently, while out of the house, her dad texted her a photo of himself holding all of her savings
• Her parents threatened to take the money, but later claimed they were just "joking"
  

Setting boundaries with parents can be hard, especially while still living under one roof.

A 16-year-old explained on Reddit that her parents, both 35, have a habit of entering her room whenever she leaves the house. The girl has two younger siblings, a 5-year-old sister and a 15-year-old brother, who she says her parents "favor," giving them "whatever they ask for" and rarely punishing them.

"I have a job. I work at a fast-food place. But my parents make me buy them things constantly. I don't mind it every once in a while, but it is constant, and they often won't tell me I'm paying until we're there," she wrote.

"Most of my money has been drained by my mom going to get coffee. I know they've bought me lots of things over the years, but they're in their 30s with two more-than-minimum-wage incomes," she continued, noting that she only makes $11 an hour.

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Stock image of a teenager with money.

Her parents "refuse" to let her get her license, but "complain constantly" about having to drive her around.

While she loves her parents, she is trying to save up money so she can eventually move out.

"They drain me and I figure our relationship will be better when im not under their roof," she wrote, explaining that she keeps her money, about $170, "hidden in a lunchbox."

However, recently, she got a text from her father asking if she "had some cash" that her mom could use. Her dad explained that her mom was "meeting someone for clothes," and didn't want to stop at an ATM.

After the teen told them she didn't "have any spare cash," her dad sent a photo holding up all the money she had saved, sarcastically writing, "Oh good then someone just left this laying around....since its not urs...I guess it goes to the owner of the house."

The poster explained to him that she was "saving" the money, and that it wasn't "spare cash," but her dad guilt-tripped her for not letting her mom use the money.

After getting home later that night, her parents noticed she "was pissy and asked about it."

"I said I don't want them going through my things, especially not my money. My dad said, 'I was more upset that you wouldn't help your mom if she needed it,'" she recalled. "I tried to explain that I would if she needed it, but the situation described was not a need."

"Dad insisted she would have paid me back, but I know from past experience she would not," the teenager shared. 

Her parents also got mad because her room was "messy" and said that if she didn't clean it, they would take her money. So, she cleaned her room, only for her parents to insist it was a "joke."

"They say they didn't take any money and that checks out, but it was the 'joking' about taking it and their history of using my money that upset me and makes me think they would take it if they wanted to," she wrote.

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Stock photo of woman arguing with teenage daughter

"My friend was concerned and is even gonna take me to the bank so I can change it to large bills and hide it under my carpet. She says they're emotionally abusive and using me," she ended the post, asking Reddit for advice.

People advised her to open a bank account that her parents don't have access to. 

"Very toxic. Open a savings account that they can't access and start depositing your cash in there or if you can't do that get a lock box with a combo they can't guess and hide the key," one person wrote. "When my kids save money I'm proud of them and wouldn't even ask to touch it, let alone just claim it because it's in 'my' house."

"Also don't excuse them using your money because they've bought you stuff/supported you. That's called parenting and comes with that responsibility. The money you earn is yours alone," the user continued.

Another person added, "Since you are over 14, you also may want to look into requesting your own credit report from the major bureaus to make sure your parents haven't fraudulently opened any accounts in your name. I wouldn't put it past a parent who acts this entitled when it comes to their child's money. You need to look out for you."